The good, the Band, and the Ugly

Aw crap... there was a bunch of stuff I've been thinking about all day, and now I can't remember any of it...
Coupla things... I'll be playing at the Elgin EVFree Church coffee house this Friday, so that's cool. Molly won't be around, but at least the Dean's will be there and possibly some Belvidere folk lookin' for an evening on the cheap. :)
Also, Pam talked to me about playing for the Cancer WalkAThon again... I'm the first "musician" asked (at least that's what she told me... she knows how to play on my ego...) which means theoretically I get my choice of time slots. I'm kinda torn. There's something magical about whatever shift I had last year (Midnight to 2?) It was kinda cool knowing that even if I was really bad and annoying, at least I was keeping people awake... which was really what I was there to do. On the other hand, more people might come if I take an earlier shift... On the other hand some other band might not be willing to take a later slot... Maybe Jim will join me? Carp. Decisions...x3

Meanwhile... I know what I was thinking... Friend of mine mentioned how exhausting it is to 'hang out' when you're with the wrong people... the ones who turn hanging out into hanging on... Boy Howdy. I'd like to say that it goes away as you get older and wiser and as your friends get cooler, but the truth is that the right person at the wrong time is often just as bad as the wrong person (regardless of timing.)
Back in the paleolithic era, when I was in the band, we were up in front 5 days a week and usually twice on Sunday. Then at night we were guests in somebodies house who we didn't know. Point is, the only time we didn't have to be "on" was when we were travelling, so needless to say, alot of emotion was released on the other band folk. But every once and a while we'd end up back in a town we had already toured, and sometimes even with the same host family. Even more rarely, they'd be cool and say something like, "Don't worry about entertaining us, whatever you need to do, do it. If you need to go in your room, put on your walkman and veg that's cool, we understand." Occasionally we'd believe them and it was wonderful, but for the most part you thanked them for the offer and hung out and watched whatever they were watching on TV and tried to be nice to whatever animal was sniffing your groin and made the best of it. You know, for the most part, it was great but sometimes it didn't matter who you were with, it was just the wrong time. And you excused yourself with a, "It's not you, it's me" look on your face. Sometimes you just had to assess the situation and realize that either you were the one in the worst shape or that the situation wasn't 'fixable' so there was no point in banging your head against some issue you could do nothing about.
The two main lessons were 1) You can't be 'ON' 24/7 and that you don't have to expect yourself to be. And 2) When you go 'OFF' it can be done gracefully or you can do it ugly. Trust is a big factor in the latter. If you can look the closest 'target' and say, "Listen, I'm done. If I say or do something inappropriate, it's not your fault and I apologize in advance." Just having someone that you can say that to tends to help reduce your likelihood of doing something you regret later.
Gotta remember that the next time I'm asked for marital/dating advice...
Alright, enough ... whatever you call this... I'm sure there's something more important I should have written about.