Sensitive Blackholes

Here's an excerpt from an email I recently wrote to a college friend regarding how to deal with that part of you that wants to care, but the other part that doesn't want to get walked all over. I've genericized it and taken names out, but I'm sticking to the spirit of the message. It's where I'm at... Your mileage may vary.

******************

From one post-sensitive person to another in the thick of it, sensitivity isn't the problem, it can keep you in tune to needs that other people aren't going to notice... and personally, I think that's really important for anyone going into your profession... The problem is prioritizing the resources. Prioritizing YOUR resources so that you can deal effectively with what's truly important to you. That's when your sensitivity is going to make you stronger. When it keeps you focused on your passion and not distracted by all the other things you think you should be caring about. If you assume your physical and emotional resources are limited, then you've got to make the best of what you've got when you've got it.
"Important things" get clearer as you get older and... well... DO more stuff. The more things you do to get out and relate to other people, the more you can keep the other fires that pop up in perspective. There's alot of unimportant stuff going on at college. Mostly narcisistic... but that's the stage of life a lot of people are at. Fortunately you're already narrowing down the scope on how you are going to make a difference.

Ok, last thing... Emotional blackholes. You know the people I'm talking about. The people you can't fix. The people that 'just need to talk to someone' but never get anywhere. As soon as you spot one, avoid it! There's nothing you can say or do that can help that person out of their situation. Usually because deep down they aren't ready to accept the consequences of 'moving on' and from experience, I can tell you that you won't be able to convince them otherwise. Anyway, the problem is, these people PREY ON sensitive people. They aggressively hunt us down trying to fill some void with our emotion. It doesn't work even if both parties want it to... Anyway, going back to the part about limited resources, you can see how feeding blackholes is actually detrimental, and not charitable. They hurt and distract you from investing in the important things.
There's a saying about knowing when to 'fish or cut bait' and I didn't learn how to do that emotionally until my 20's. But recognizing the need is half the battle.